I am doing the Beth Moore bible study on Esther with some girls from my small group. If you have never read anything by Beth Moore, you need to drive to your nearest bookstore and pick out one of her books. I love her. I love the way she makes things so easy to relate to & she seems so down to earth. Oh, and she cracks me up. Big bonus points for that.
Anyway, this week focused a lot on fear. She said something in our video last night that really rang true to me...she basically said that it's hard to really understand fear until you become a parent. Fear takes on a whole new meaning when you are responsible for another life. When you love another person so much that you feel like your heart may burst.
I have so many new fears now. Irrational fears. When Grayson was a newborn, I was so paranoid about him suffocating while sleeping. I would check on him while he was sleeping. I would get Ben to check on him while he was sleeping. I would get that anxious feeling before bed & truly felt that if I didn't go peak on him before I went to sleep, that something terrible would happen. Although that fear has subsided there are new fears that come with him getting older. What if he falls and hits his head on the ground? What if we get in a car accident and he gets seriously hurt? What if he chokes on something when I'm not looking? What if someone takes him? What if I fail him as a parent?
Those types of fears can be paralyzing, if you let them. Those are the types of fears that Satan uses against us. I know that it is completely normal as a parent to have these fears sometimes...but I certainly do not want to live my life always thinking "what if??"
I am so guilty of doing this. I know that some of those fears could possibly become a reality--but I am not going to live in fear. If one of my "what if" fears happens, then guess what? I have a loving God to get me through it. God was good yesterday & He will be good tomorrow.
"For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you." - Isaiah 41:13
Anyway, this week focused a lot on fear. She said something in our video last night that really rang true to me...she basically said that it's hard to really understand fear until you become a parent. Fear takes on a whole new meaning when you are responsible for another life. When you love another person so much that you feel like your heart may burst.
I have so many new fears now. Irrational fears. When Grayson was a newborn, I was so paranoid about him suffocating while sleeping. I would check on him while he was sleeping. I would get Ben to check on him while he was sleeping. I would get that anxious feeling before bed & truly felt that if I didn't go peak on him before I went to sleep, that something terrible would happen. Although that fear has subsided there are new fears that come with him getting older. What if he falls and hits his head on the ground? What if we get in a car accident and he gets seriously hurt? What if he chokes on something when I'm not looking? What if someone takes him? What if I fail him as a parent?
Those types of fears can be paralyzing, if you let them. Those are the types of fears that Satan uses against us. I know that it is completely normal as a parent to have these fears sometimes...but I certainly do not want to live my life always thinking "what if??"
I am so guilty of doing this. I know that some of those fears could possibly become a reality--but I am not going to live in fear. If one of my "what if" fears happens, then guess what? I have a loving God to get me through it. God was good yesterday & He will be good tomorrow.
"For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you." - Isaiah 41:13

















