We celebrated Michelle's life on Monday with a beautiful memorial service full of friends, laughter, & really old (and fantastic) pictures. I spent 3 days with some of my best friends. We cried, we laughed, we hugged, we grieved together.
Now I am back in Tennessee. Life is going to keep on moving & somehow we are just going to have to pick up the pieces and keep on moving, too. At this moment, that seems so hard to do. It feels so strange to do the mundane every day tasks now. I feel like time should be frozen.
I sent a group text today to show the joy of traveling with a small toddler. See also: the text included a picture of Griffin screaming in his carseat. The group text used to have 3 names; it now has only 2. I had to catch myself when I started typing in Michelle's name. Moments like that are hard. I know they will come & go, but when they do come, they are the type of moments that take my breath away. Life isn't fair. Cancer just plain sucks.
I know this will get easier & I know that where she is now there is no more pain, no more suffering, no more cancer. But right now it's still fresh & it's still so surreal. It's just hard.